Strength isn’t just a reward for good body image. Sometimes it’s what helps you build it.
A lot of people think they need to feel better about their body before they can walk into a gym. “I’ll start once I lose a little weight.” Or maybe, “I’ll start once I feel more confident.” Or sometimes, “I just don’t want people looking at me.”
I hear some version of this almost every week. In fact, a client literally told me this morning that she put off coming to the gym for two years because she felt like she needed to be in better shape before she started.
But here’s the thing…
Better Body Image Doesn’t Come Before Exercise
Better body image doesn’t come before exercise. I think, for a lot of people, it comes because of the relationship they build with their body through exercise.
Now before anyone comes for me… I’m not saying working out magically fixes body image. We all know people who exercise every day and still pick themselves apart in the mirror. That’s not what I’m talking about. I’m talking about what happens when you stop using exercise as a way to fight your body and start using it as a way to experience your body.
Fighting Your Body vs. Experiencing Your Body
Because those are two completely different things. Instead of asking, “How do I look?” You start thinking things like… I can deadlift that now? Or “I wasn’t this strong six months ago.” Or most commonly, “My back/shoulder/whatever doesn’t hurt anymore.”
In my case, it was this: “I chased my kids around the yard and wasn’t completely wiped out.”
Those moments matter. I’ve never had a client finish a heavy set of deadlifts and say, “You know what I’m thinking about right now? My thighs and cellulite.” Not once. Because when you’re focused on doing something hard, your brain doesn’t have a whole lot of space left to obsess over the size of your thighs.
Strength Has a Funny Way of Changing the Conversation
I always tell my clients that strength has a funny way of changing the conversation. When all your energy is focused on shrinking your body, it’s really easy to miss everything your body is already doing for you. But the minute you get excited because you did your first push-up, picked up a heavier dumbbell, or got off the floor without using your hands… Your body starts becoming something more than just an appearance. It becomes a teammate. And I think that’s where healing starts.
Real Talk: I Have Bad Body Image Days Too
Anytime I’m having a bad body image day, I remember all the awesome stuff my body has done for me. I grew an entire human, birthed him, and then fed him exclusively from my own body for six months. I’ve walked like millions of steps. I have climbed mountains, swam to islands in the ocean, danced the night away, and cried so many tears. I did a whole Instagram post on it, so anytime you need a friendly reminder why your body is awesome, check it out.
You don’t lift weights and then magically wake up healed. It’s not like you suddenly love every inch of yourself. Let’s be honest… I don’t know anyone who wakes up every morning thinking, “Wow. Every single thing about my body is perfect today.” Some days you’re going to have a bad body image day. Me too. The goal isn’t to never have those days. The goal is to stop letting those days decide whether you deserve to take care of yourself.
You Don’t Have to Love Your Body to Take Care of It
You don’t have to love your body to feed it. You don’t have to love your body to let it rest. And you definitely don’t have to love your body before you let it get stronger. I think that’s one of the best reasons to start. Every workout is another opportunity to prove to yourself that your body is so much more than something to look at. It’s something to live in. It’s something that carries you through your life every single day. And I think that’s worth celebrating, regardless of what it looks like.
So Maybe Don’t Wait
So if you’ve been waiting until you feel “good enough” to start exercising…Maybe don’t wait. Maybe let movement be part of the thing that helps you build a better relationship with your body.
Not because it changes your body. Because it changes what you believe your body is capable of.
If any of this sounds like you, I’d love to keep the conversation going. You can find me on Instagram at @tara_de_leon_fitness, where I post the strength stuff and the real talk in roughly equal measure. If you’re curious about training together, in person or virtually, come say hi at taradeleonfitness.com. No pressure, no judgment, just a conversation. And if you want to hear more of this, my co-hosts and I dig into food, fitness, and feelings every week on the Wellness: Rebranded podcast.
Catch ya on the next rep!
